Tuesday, February 14, 2006

You know, Pink has always struck me as pretty cool, but this just concretes it:

(regarding her video for "Stupid Girls"...which you can see the lyrics for here)

I feel like so many women have been out there fighting for our independence and our equality and to further our rights, and girls like this come along and wipe out all of our progress and they push this size-zero image that's unattainable for the average person. No girl needs any more reasons to think that her boobs aren't big enough [because of] this mindless, unquestioning consumerism...In every tabloid [has been the headline], "A Chubby Pink Walking Her Dogs," and I laugh at it because I don't, at the end of the day, [care] what these people [think]. They're not feeding me, they're not clothing me, and they're not having sex with me...and they're not my dogs.

Right on.

On a totally different note...I hate this day. I don't really dislike Valentine's Day all that much by itself(although it is a little sugary-sweet for my taste, stereotypical, not a big fan of pink, and diamonds don't do anything for me), but I just had a really bad day today. I woke up feeling like CRAP - but I couldn't stay home because I missed 2 days last week. I go to school and it's all pink heart and flowers mania and I'm sitting there thinking...well...not really thinking anything other than a monotonic(is that a word? it is now) GRRRR going through my head. Wanted to snap at people over nothing all day.

But hey, Chuck Norris facts!

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once ate a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.

Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris's fist.

Chuck Norris challenged a statue to a staring contest. Chuck remains undefeated.

Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds till." After you ask, "Two seconds to what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.

If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the hell down.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.


Anonymous .ck. said...

That made me smile...

9:00 PM


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