POTC 3 was AWESOME! Even if me and Lydia were the only ones that dressed up because Jesse, James, and Jerome wussed out on us. Jerks. haha, but we had a lot of fun and then we went to go eat CiCi's.

I went to work...work was uneventful...rawr rawr rawr...and then after work I was headed out to go hang out with Jesse and company again. The original plan was that we were going to all meet at Jesse's house and just hang out, videogames and stuff, and everyone spend the night. Jesse's mom said though that if I spent the night, everyone had to stay up all night (which I don't really understand, personally, but hey whatever), so the modified plan was for me to stay until one or so and then just head home. Well, I call them, and they're at a graveyard somewhere, want me to meet them there. So I head that way (it was out in the middle of NOWHERE - Peachtree something off Schifferdecker road), and I get there, and they had got Jerome's truck stuck. I guess there was a road in the cemetery and it lead to a break in the fence, which looked like it went back to the main road - nope! just a ditch. They try various things to get Jerome's truck out, and all the meanwhile we're having cars driving past - most of them slow down like they're going to help and then just speed back up. A cop shows up, or more accurately someone from the CJ Fire Department, and of course, right after that we have 3 people stop and ask if we need help. hah. So the dude proceeds to tell us how they were trespassing on private property, and they're going to get charged with property damage, and he has to call in state and county officials, blah blah blah. The county guy shows up, and all they(county + CJFD dude) do is just sit there and basically tell us that they can't do anything until state gets there. The state guy gets there, looks at the whole thing, listens to Jesse's story, starts laughing, says "Ok, let's get this out of here, I don't want to be here all night." Zach shows up in his truck, gets stuck trying to get Jerome unstuck, and then they finally call a tow dude, and then Jerome's dad (ouch, his parents are a wee bit crazy), and they both show up around the same time. Takes the tow dude like 10 minutes to get Jerome's truck out, and then they're all waiting on Zach's dad, and at this point I decide to just head home (at very close to midnight) because Jerome's parents hate me anyways.

arrgh. Longer story of the "I hate people" comment yesterday:

I said I'd hang out with Jessica and some of her friends, because it'd probably be the last time I'd see Jake for a long long time, if ever. So we're at her house and people start showing up, and I swear to god, every single person said something rude to me. First it was that I looked like a watermelon (pink and green shoes, green and pink shirt, and jeans), then it was that when I'm not wearing too much color, I'm wearing all black ("No I don't, I never wear all black, I don't even own a pair of black shoes" "yes you do!") and I look like a goth emo kid. Then it was vegetarian jokes, then it was jokes about my birthday party, and just on and on and on. Like, I can handle a few jokes, but when it's six people laughing at my expense at once, and nobody's making snide jokes about anyone else...yeah. The icing on the cake was when I went to leave and I gave Joe a hug, Jake goes "What? You're leaving?" "Uh, yeah, I just SAID that." "Well, sorry, I don't pay attention to anything the veggie says unless Jessica gets my attention first!" uh huh...

and the same person is complaining about how her boyfriend is messed up because he doesn't want to spend every day with her. They've been dating two months!! ok, I'd be annoyed if I went over to my boyfriend's house and he played World of Warcraft for five hours straight, but for crying out loud, he's working a crappy factory job for like, eight hours a day, so if he doesn't want to party or whatever, then you know? She's suffocating him.

I feel kind of bad because I had made up my mind that I was going to be all angry next time she called, but it's really hard to be angry at someone who's crying over their boyfriend. Bah!

ARGH, I am so sick of people around here. I can't wait to move.

Annoyance/anger aside, POTC 3 is tomorrow - and I am EXCITED YAY. Outfit all ready to go and everything - just need to grab some stuff to change into, since I didn't want to wear high-heeled boots all night at work. I was just going to change into some black converse, but I figured that would probably just make me look like some kind of freaky hippy. hence, the full change of clothes.

I think as far as the job stuff goes, as much as I hate Shake's, I'm going to stay there and only work a few days a week. hopefully not with the crazy bitch girl. and try and focus on my etsy store too. Anddd, starting at the very end of May, I am going to try VERY hard to not spend money on ANYTHING that isn't essential. (so basically, all I'll spend money on is gas haha) For the entire month of June (and probably until I move). I dunno how well I'll rise to the challenge, but I'm going to try dangit!

So with some of my graduation money (mostly, the refund from the camera), I kind of went on a book buying spree. Sort of. Maybe.

The Starving Artist's Way, Fruits and Fresh Fruits (the mentioned way before Japanese street fashion books - they JUST got here and I literally squealed a little bit), Crochet Couture, a book about Egyptian Mythology, a book by Diane Sylvan, and Sniffin Glue (a book on punk that also has the collected reprinted zine issues by the same name).

My goal now is to spend as little money as possible until I move, since I'm quitting Shake's (hopefully today), and might not get another job - I think I might just try focusing on my etsy store and flea-marketing/garage-saling for random stuff to resale on eBay. See how that goes.

Anyways I'm almost late for a Pac Sun interview so yeah

Joss Whedon is awesome. we need more people like him.

and I've been reading the story of Gwen Arujo and Teena Brandon...soooo depressing. blah.

Oh yeah, I can't believe I forgot to post this earlier:

#1 - this page is HILARIOUS. I love the radioactive ooze one.

#2 - Jerry Falwell died sometime last week, I think it was. (so busy with graduation I forget the exact day). And, I'm not sad. I'm not going to say I'm dancing circles or anything, but...come on:

If you're not a born-again Christian, you're a failure as a human being.

And, I know that I'll hear from them for this. But, throwing God out successfully with the help of the federal court system, throwing God out of the public square, out of the schools. The abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked. And when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad. I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way -- all of them who have tried to secularize America -- I point the finger in their face and say, "You helped this happen."
(about 9/11)

AIDS is not just God's punishment for homosexuals; it is God's punishment for the society that tolerates homosexuals.

The idea that religion and politics don't mix was invented by the Devil to keep Christians from running their own country.

Christians, like slaves and soldiers, ask no questions.

It appears that America's anti-Biblical feminist movement is at last dying, thank God, and is possibly being replaced by a Christ-centered men's movement which may become the foundation for a desperately needed national spiritual awakening.

The Bible is the inerrant ... word of the living God. It is absolutely infallible,without error in all matters pertaining to faith and practice, as well as in areas such as geography, science, history, etc.

The ACLU is to Christians what the American Nazi party is to Jews.

someone who would probably just as soon have me burned at the stake as have me be stuck in the kitchen with no rights at all...nope, sorry. I can't mourn for him. And honestly, I think it's kind of scary that anyone would. (let alone the president)

yup...fun day at Springfield planned...if I get up off my butt and go shower and stuff now. haha. so I'm out.

(if the fonts are all screwy, whoops. copying and pasting does that)

yeeeaah...

I set up an interview at Pac Sun for Wednesday at three.

Everyone at Shake's was way rude to me today. and another new girl was getting the same treatment I was (especially from the girl who was WAY rude to me and kept treating me like an idiot, both days). And they expect you to be on call almost any day you're off but don't pay you for it, expect you to keep your plans free.

Sorry...no thanks!

Cross your fingers that I get the job at PS so I can quit there!

ARGH.

I got hired at Shake's. and maybe I'm just a wuss but I'm kind of dreading going back later today. Urgh. Especially since I'm going to the movies afterwards with Alicia, and I'm probably going to have to run home in between to shower or something, or else be stick all over and have major hat-hair.

What makes it worse is that I just set up an interview at Pac Sun. And, of course, I don't know if I'll get the job or not...but...a job at Pac Sun sounds a helluva lot better than food service. But I don't want to quit after only working two shifts. But but but...

blah.

so Alicia's long and rambly post got me thinking long and rambly (damn you Alicia). It's interesting how far I've come or how much I've changed since high school started. I used to be SO insecure. And since about sixth grade, there was always at least one friend in my group that wasn't really a friend. Actually, that started with LeAnn in third grade...then it was Stacia in middle school until we had that falling out, then it was LeAnn and Thia in freshman year, until we had THAT falling out, and I was so upset because I had all these classes with them and I had to ignore them and their constant snide remarks. And I had thought they were my best friends, hah. I remember Thia getting up in my face in science class and not one of my friends stuck up for me. I remember when they got over it randomly at the beginning of sophomore year and I was torn between being really really angry at them and wanting their approval again. For some unknown reason. Alex moving didn't help with me being upset during freshman year, either. Alicia was there and was really my only friend through a lot of it. At the beginning of sophomore year I started being friends with Jessica, we used to be SUCH good friends. I started being better friends with LeAnn again too...I dunno if I'll ever trust her again after all that crap she pulled, but she's grown up a lot now. Stacia too.

I remember, though this is going back and forth now, in like...seventh or eighth grade, when I realized that things I always took for granted (like, for example, equal rights for everyone, regardless of race/sex/orientation/religion etc.) were NOT something everyone believed in. I remember hearing the phrase "gay rights" and honest-to-goodness thinking it was some kind of joke because why would gay people have any less rights than the rest of us? And I ended up arguing with everyone for the rest of my career at Diamond, haha.

And sophomore and junior year are just kind of blurs. Spencer and his whiny depressiveness after we broke up, a lot of painful not-knowing-where-I-am-ness...somewhere in this I discovered the Clash, and a lot of the other music I listen to now. It sounds so so SO corny, but I can't even describe how much of an influence punk and ska music has been to me. It makes up a lot of who I am now. To know that at some point somewhere else someone had thought exactly what I was thinking and put it to music, music that anyone could play or sing along to no matter who they were or how much musical knowledge they had, music that spoke to me and said "HEY! Listen up!" and smacked me across the face with the loud anger of it all, music that was my anger at injustice, my passion (two things I feel are big important parts of me), put into form; that music gave me hope and direction and the knowledge that I wasn't the only one that felt that way, and I will never, ever forget it. Music is so important to me.

And it was in the middle of junior year that I started making/stencilling my own clothes...another thing that's so important to me for reasons I can't even put into words. I know a lot of people don't view it the same way as I do, but to me, clothes are an extension of who I am, they're the part of me that I can easily show the world, they're things that I spend hours making, art that everyone can take part in and enjoy without having to pay to see a gallery.

Summer b/t junior and senior year...ahh...a lot of restlessness, and another blow to my self-esteem at the very end of it. The next two months were just like, hit after hit to my self esteem, due to the fact that I seem to attract either commitment-phobes or people who are gay and just don't know it yet, heh. I got so annoyed I was just like, screw it. And somewhere in here, came the realization that Jessica and I weren't the friends we used to be, because she'd started changing, or maybe she hadn't and I did, but either way, it's come to the point now where I'm biting my tongue more than I'm not, and I don't think that's a healthy sign in any relationship...especially when she never bites her tongue to keep from saying rude things to me, or if she does she tells me about it later.

I think that, though a lot of me hasn't changed, I know that there are times and places to argue now, and I'm a LOT more confident than I used to be. I used to always be looking to my friends for approval and now I can honestly say if someone tells me they don't like me or what I listen to or what I'm wearing, I can shrug and say "yeah, your opinion doesn't matter to me.". Does that make me a bitch? Maybe in a society where any sign of confidence is immediately hailed as arrogance and conceit, I get comments any time body image comes up because I'm like "you know, I don't really have a problem with my body. I love the way I look and I'm happy with myself." Yeah sure, there are things that aren't perfect about me, but that's because I'm human and not some glossed-over-photoshopped picture. And I love my imperfections right up there with my perfections, wouldn't change 'em for the world.

anyways...

project graduation was fun, minus a few parts. the place we were at (Celebration Station in Tulsa) had this kind of creepy carnival-esque vibe...it probably wouldn't have been so bad in daylight, but when it was dark outside and there's this big stuffed animals hanging from the ceiling randomly, all these arcade games going off constantly in the relative silence, and these HUGE reallyfreakingcreepy animatronic stuffed animals singing...yeah, it was really easy to imagine the whole thing turning into a slasher where we got locked inside and the stuffed animals came to life and killed us all one by one after we illogically split up.

the go-kart track was LOADS of fun though. I probably spent the most time on it. I had Alicia as my passenger one round and probably scared the living crap out of her haha.

I'm so glad, though. Like...there's maybe 3-4 people that I'll really miss from Diamond. I'm sure there's more, that Ryan's yoda antics will make me miss him a bit from time to time...but really truly miss? yeah, 3-4 people. And I'm moving and I am SO excited about it!

New hair as of Wednesday night:



I love it. And I was surprised, because I was waiting on hearing lots of snide comments at school on Thursday...maybe they were just being nice since it was my last day, but I got nothing except for nice comments. Even from people who don't normally have a lot of nice things to say to me.

AND I CAN TOTALLY PUT IT IN A MOHAWK. hahaha! I did for project graduation.

The only thing is that I wish I would have had time to paint my senior tile for art. I was going to put a picture of the confederate flag and "you lost, get over it" around it. But I was too busy finishing my comic book panel sketch from Fray to rile up the hicks one last time. Oh well, my comic book panel sketch is worth it.

I was a bit irritated - went to the mall with Casey and Alicia on Thursday to try on this pair of mary-jane docs I'd been debating on buying. I finally decided I wanted them yesterday and went to buy them with some graduation money...yeaaaah, they got transferred out on Friday. So now I have to drive to Springfield to get them >_<

hrmm I think I'm out...off to work before too long, at the custard place *sigh*

sooo...last week (as in, the week that ended a week ago) was a very very bad week, for various reasons, including Heath totally blowing me off when we were supposed to hang out. for no apparent reason, that was over a week ago and I still haven't heard from him. Reeeally pissed me off. Of course, the fact that I was pissed off probably had something to do with the fact that the day before (we were supposed to go out on Friday), this chick from work wouldn't stop texting me during school, trying to get me to cover for her. I was like, "I have plans, did you ask everyone else?" "Yes and nobody can do it, I'm out of town and I won't be back in town until after I'm supposed to be at work."

Uhuh. We only work two freakin' days a week, you dipshit, how hard is it to ACTUALLY WORK ON THOSE DAYS? It's not like we don't know our schedule three weeks ahead of time!

So I call Heath and we rescheduled for Saturday instead of Friday. And she comes in Saturday while I'm at work, and doesn't even say thank-you to me ("Oh, hi Taunie!" "Hi." *she walks to the other end of the room and stands by Amy, completely ignoring me*). Then she quit, and said something to Amy that really pissed her off, which I didn't find out until yesterday. Apparently she was trying to tell Amy that Jake(another coworker) and I were lying about how she tried to get us to cover for her? or something? and Amy told her that she knew that wasn't true, so Taunie tried to pull "Oh, well I do SO MUCH around here". "Yeah, you are a good worker, and that means you get good hours, but it doesn't mean that you get to do whatever you want." And then she quit. Good freakin' riddance, she always talked down to me anyways.

Speaking of which, today I started at Shake's (yay for a second job...blech) and while it was FREAKING CRAZY BUSY, it wasn't too hard. There was this one girl who treated me like I have less braincells than a brick or something, and it was REALLY starting to piss me off, but by the time I was about to blow up on her, I only had 30 minutes or so left. Then the manager asked me to go to Wal-Mart to get some more bananas (seven bunches, I got some funny looks haha) and said when I got back from that I could go ahead and clock out. I had taken my Shake's shirt off in the car because I was wearing two tank tops under it and it is just too hot outside for that. I get back, put up the bananas, and I start making the concrete I paid for earlier, for my mom, and the aforementioned chick walks over to me and goes "Uh, you need to put your apron and hat back on. You're going to get in TROUBLE." "Actually, she said after I brought the bananas in, I could clock out, I'm just making this concrete for my mom that I paid for earlier." Which shut her up really fast. Ugh. I hope I don't have to work with her too often.

only two months, only two months, only two months...

siiiigh

and in their handbook, it says natural colored makeup only. although I dunno how strictly they enforce it, since I was wearing bright shimmery orange eyeshadow today and nobody said anything, but still, that could suck hardcore...I don't even know how many natural colors of makeup I OWN, hahaha.

speaking of 'only'...

ONLY THREE AND A HALF DAYS OF SCHOOL sweet action!

ok. so this makes me a massive, massive dork and I don't even care. that chick I bought the kryolan makeup off of, on eBay - aka this lady - we got to talking while I was asking her about the stuff getting here in the freakish shipping delay, and mentioned I was making my prom dress. she said she thought that was cool and to send her pics (which will be posted at the end of this post) when I was done. I did that yesterday and she emailed back saying "You made that?!??!! AHHHHH!! I'm so impressed, AND you are really cute!! Good job, little lady!! I wish I had skills like that in high school. Hope you had fun at prom! My prom date was a redhead too, heehee"

it made my day. I'm not big on...I dunno...when people say they have idols...role models are ok, 'idols' weird me out. But yeah, she's definitely on my role model list - independent company and all. And super nice to boot. I'M NOT A CREEPY STALKER I SWEAR.

I just about peed my pants the other day when I went in to say hi to Amy while I was at the mall. I heard the first few chords of a song that sounded veeeery familiar and I look at the tv - it's 'Multiply and Divide' off the Soviettes LP III, that I've been listening to like crazy. I was like "I LOVE THIS SONG! WE HAVE THE SOVIETTES ON OUR DVD!!! so cool!!"

Although we have Hilary Duff and Avril on this cd too. So I guess you can't have some awesomeness without some my-ears-are-bleeding-ness.

I'm almost done editing the pictures for the massive eBay-a-thon. Unfortunately, I have massive nausea and I'm working on a headache. so I don't know if I'll actually get done with the massive-list-a-thon (I like that phrase better).

So I picked up one of Ashley's bunny rabbits to play with it...an older one that was apparently NOT socialized...and it scratched the ever-loving shit out of me. I look like an emo kid. scratches on the inside of one wrist, scratches all down the inside of the other arm and the outside of that wrist...it even got my tattoo! (which is already suffering from two bug bites, dammit). just a little skritch on my tattoo though, nothing big.

BUST sent a reader-call-out-email thing about a fashion spread they're doing, asking people to send in pictures of their clothes. I'm totally going to do that. I need to make a few shirts first though...

my job search is going ok. I've applied at Pac Sun, Lowe's, Shake's(technically haven't yet, will be turning in the app tomorrow), and someplace else I think I'm forgetting (probably not a good sign). Oh yeah, Target. Their interview took for-freakin-ever and they sent me a postcard(wtf?!) to tell me I didn't get the job. I have an interview at Jo-Ann's on Monday. It's hard, because I'll only be able to work 20-25 hours a week for the, y'know, two weeks until I get out of school...but after that, I want to be working 40 hours a week. I wish I could get some kind of 9-5 job. Maybe telemarketing. Or maybe I can weasel a bit and see if Heath's grandparents need any more help, haha.

oh yeah, pictures: (this is not the full run, because I'm lazy, and don't have all of them on photobucket also)





walking in:



picture of the back at home:



I was sooo proud and got a lot of compliments on it throughout the night.

We went to the Humane Society to file a lost dog form for Callie with them. It was sad...there were all these kittens and cats (I looked around the cat room while I was waiting on mom) and the SECOND I walked into the room they all started mewing for attention. I would just stick a few fingers in the cage and they'd go crazy. There was a beautiful calico kitten, and a full-grown Siamese (that was a stray, go figure), and this big ol tiger-looking stray too. All of them just wanted someone to love on them. I wanted to take them all home. It depresses me to know that really all I can do is go back and get one, just ONE when I move out. :( And that by then, a lot of those beautiful animals, dogs too, are going to be dead because nobody cares. And all they want is affection.

oh...I dunno how I forgot...one of our dogs has gone, Callie, we had her for almost 11 years I think, and I miss her, and I wish our pets would stop disappearing for no reason. it's not like she could have even got hit by a car, she doesn't GO anywhere, just wanders around the front yard and comes back inside. maybe she got bit by a snake. I dunno. I wish our neighbors had her and would give her back.

I'm annoyed. I had just started taking pictures of all those blasted things I'm going to sell on eBay and my camera died. BAH. And there weren't any more charged batteries, so I'll just have to continue tomorrow. le sigh.

I had fun at prom and looked totally hot. Pictures later, I have them and have them uploaded but I'm just too lazy right now haha.

Oh yes, I've now hit my second post on my new blog, D.I.Y. or DIE. I'm sure it's probably not most of you peoples' cup o'tea, but I think I should have fun with it anyways. If nothing else, at least there will be ONE site on the internet with crochet patterns I'll wear!

Debate of the month (or week, at least) is whether I want to get an apartment further from the college, and cheaper, and drive, or one closer, and walk, and save on gas money. Bearing in mind that I'll probably be driving any day it's cold. I think I might just go for one within a 5 minute drive...I dunno. I need to get up there sometime this month and look at them.